06 October 2003 | 7:29 p.m.,

dead bodies and a troublemaker childhood

I woke up kind of disturbed this morning. Well that is to say my sleep was disturbed by my freaky dreams and I felt a bit yuk and tired as a result.

Last night I was watching "Waking the Dead" which was all a bit weird [and means I will HAVE to watch part 2 tonight to see if there is an actual explanation to all the weirdness..] but the plot revolved around all these bodies, one of the mummified, that had been discovered in various crevices around this particular house - in the walls, the bricked up fireplace and under the floorboards. So there were lots of shots of skulls, bones and mummified dead people.

So I go to sleep and next thing I'm having some freaky dream involving some guy who has childrens mummified corpses INSIDE HIM. There was like a door in his stomach. I don't remember all that was going on although someone was trying to get me out my bed to "go and investigate" and I was telling them to fuck off. Then there was a weird bit [no!?! one of my dreams with a weird bit? well i never..] where I was on a street and suddenly there were frying pans flying through the air and I THINK tractors trying to take over the place. But really I'm not sure about the tractors, its all a bit vague and jumbled!! So yeah.. odd dream and much disturbed sleep.

Was a bit ratty at one point today despite my best intentions. P [who may just have been joking, I'm not sure] told me I obviously have a shopping problem and maybe he just hit a little too close to home or I'm just getting sick of people exaggerating it. Anyway that pissed me off. And it was line check day and we all know I hate that.

Aside from that it was an alright day I guess. Nothing spectacular.

Although sometimes I really do wonder about Tucks. If he likes me in a more than "people who go for breaks together and have a good laugh" type way. Probably tomorrow I'll be back to the "oh don't be so bloody daft, you're imagining it" stance on that one. Its just the way he looks at me sometimes though. I dunno. I can't really explain it, its just a feeling I get sometimes...

I got another email off my childhood stalker after I sent him a short reply telling him he freaked me out a bit by remembering so much about me. He said he was in my class and mentioned the boy that lived across the street from me and said I'd probably remember him - yeah, I grew up playing with him and his wee sister. He also told me who his friends grandparents were. Apparently this Paul [who is now dead but thats not the point..] told my stalker that once when he was wee, I ran threw a garden and made a big footprint in the soil and he got the blame. I have no recollection of this at all!! I thought I was a wee angel when I was little!!! Not the type to get someone else in trouble!

Ah well I'm off to watch more Waking the Dead and hopefully not have any more bizarre dreams..