07 November 2003 | 4:29 p.m.,

moving on?

Me and my mum went out this morning, down to Culzean for a walk. It was really gorgeous with all the autumn colours and such and we were so warm we came back with the windows rolled down in the car! Its NOVEMBER for heavens sake!! Not that I'm complaining mind you!

But anyway, when we came back my dad said I had to call this guy back. I recognised the name as it was the guy I had to send my CV to, for a job I applied for the other week. Its in another meat factory not far from where I work now, but its a lab job and they said full training would be given. I'm assuming its salaried although it didn't say in the advert.

I know it would be a much better job for me and I would be using my qualifications more than I am now. PLus my mum would be happy for once. So I applied.

But I like where I am NOW for so many reasons, not least because of P who I know I wouldn't see again as I don't see him out of work as it is. Its not like I have guys exactly beating a path to my door and ignoring everything else he's a good mate. I get on well with so many people there, a far cry from when I started and I used to just about run away in fear from Old Tam the forklift driver. I guess I have really come out of my shell since I have been there but thats not really saying much so starting a new place with new people I don;t know fills me with dread.

I wouldn't even know where to sit in the canteen. Will they even serve bacon butties???!!?

I don't know what the hours are but I think it will be Mon-Fri and thats another thing I would so miss about where I am. It took a little getting used to working 11 hour days but I love all the days off. I think I'd feel I had no time to myself working Mon-fri. One good point of that though is that it might cure my shopaholism once and for all as I HATE shopping on a Saturday with a fiery passion. Its murder.

I'm jumping the gun totally, he only called to arrange an interview [I really don't think i've ever had that before, they usually just send you a letter telling when to turn up..], but I just have this feeling. Its a lot to do with the last tarot reading I did and the way I interpreted it though.

Anyway I was feeling sick before I called him but when I said to my mum she suggested we went shopping for a suit and I feel better now! See, its THERAPY!! We went in New Look first and I tried on the first black trouser suit I saw and it was a great fit so that was pretty painless and I'll feel a lot more confident in that than the old navy skirt suit I have from when I was originally job hunting. i never felt comfortable in it and the fact it was navy and I had to have navy shoes and navy bag. Yuck yuck. Totally navy overdose and it made me feel like I was back at school. It was just bad.

If I don;t get the job then I can wear the trousers to the Xmas night out and save me buying another pair as I had planned.

I guess I'll see what happens. The interview isn't til Tuesday and now I know what I'm wearing and don't have THAT to worry about, I'm not going to let it ruin the rest of my holiday. At least I don't have to take a sickie to go to the interview, I don't go back to work til next Thursday.

I think I need a nice big plate of comfort food pasta for tea tonight though!